From Where It All Begins..

I began writing when I was thirteen, because I had bought a very colorful, and what seemed to me to be a very artistic notebook. The notebook seemed like the perfect medium in which to begin my writing. Actually it was like a diary which I always hide during those times..seemed to be a very grown-up thing to do, and so, being thirteen and fancying myself a grown-up, I decided to do just that. I made a typical scrap notebook where I wrote all those stuffs I wanna write to. I even asked my friends to write there for some funny purposes.. Love, crushes..:)                            On the verge of my adolescence -- in itself a journey of the immortalized, and beginning school in a public environment -- yet another journey rich with adventure, I wrote mostly about cute boys and funny events in the classroom, mostly made up of the synopses of notes passed around during class. Of course, I also wrote bad poetry and drew random doodles of flowers and prom gowns. I admit, I am not a good artist but I always try to be good into it. But those were really the most prolific writing days I ever had. To me, everything was new and worth encoding. Nothing like it had ever happened to anyone before, and nothing like it would ever happen again. Armed with the arrogance and blissful ignorance of youth, I kept logs of significant conversations with friends, sightings of crushes strolling around the school yard with slutty girls, practiced my signature appended with my "married" surname. It goes like this jasminmoralessahagun. 

hahaha! How funny. I'll tell something about it on the latter part of my page. On the 3rd year of my HighSchool, I started to join Journalism in our school. On the very first time I attended the training I trembled so much. I decided to choose the photojournalism that time. I thought it was kinda exciting. :) Actually, I've tried it already when I was on the 2nd year, oh well I suddenly surrendered. Target ko nun is yung Copy Reading, do you know that category, certainly. Since then, I began to work on it. Capturing pictures I've never got, putting catchy captions..But unfortunately, I'd lack of confidence then. Umiiyak ako nun everytime na may laban na hindi ko kasama mga friends ko. One time lang naman yun eh. Anyways, it's another story to be tell, so enough.I've been writing semi-regularly ever since, as much as I could while doing assignments. I still keep diaries, but nothing really happens much in my life enough for me to write long entries about. My attitude towards writing has shifted, too -- after exhausting the love angle, which is necessarily self-indulgent, I find that writing about anything else -- my day, my studies even this article -- is still self-indulgent, and it's starting to leave a bad taste in my mouth. I'm trying to "expand my repertoire" of sorts, observing people that pass me by, wondering what their stories are, but it hasn't been easy. There came to the point na sinunog ko pa yung diary ko. Wala lang, I was just that afraid na mabasa to ng kapatid or my cousin who kept on bugging me to show it sakanya.Despite my insecurities and my bouts of self-doubt, I am still inclined to think that maybe those thirteen years writing meant something. In the beginning, I thought it was just something that everyone else did -- very angsty, very grunge. After all, no one had ever really minded or chastised or pointed out that particular hobby. I took it for granted because everyone else did.

But now I am seriously enjoying writing while studying to solve those endless problems in our subjects, seriously thinking that this is one of those things that I still find effortless. Others may find find my works boring, if they have given the chance to read it. 

Mind you, writing is still worlds away from writing well, and I don't have any delusions that I don't have anything to improve on, but at least it's something that comes easily for me. So maybe, you know, call it a quarter life crisis, or whatever, but during these times, when you start re-evaluating what to do with the rest of your life, that's one of the few things that I am pretty sure about: writing is something I want to do.
The Writer, Jassie